Through the eyes of a soldier during WWII

Today's blog is a copy of an article from WWII. it was written by my father as a letter to my mother. I don't know how it was published but it was so here goes.
Per the Times Dispatch
Corporal Raymond Whitsell is seeing a lot of country with the battalion of army engineers. In the following letter to his wife, he interestingly relates some of the experiences:

At sea, September 3, 1945
Mrs. Mabel Whitsell
602 Washington
West Plains, MO
Dear wife,
Here I send something besides V-mail. I won't promise much more news than a V-mail but I have to say hello and let you know I'm well and hope you and all the folks are well and happy.
They tell me that censorship is lifted so I'll try to tell you some things that I haven't be3en allowed to tell. First, tell all the folks why I haven't written then oftener. One reason is I haven't been getting any mail but the big reason is paper shortage.
you have heard paper shortage talked ever since the war started and so have I , but I am beginning to feel it now. Nearly everyone on ship is out of writing paper and no way to get more til we hit land.
Boy! I am wanting that day to come regardless of where it ism but I would prefer the food(good) ole U.S.A.
One of the reasons for not writing, I am lazy. I'm afraid I'll have to spend my life in the army, as I am too lazy to live my life out of the army, but I'd be glad to try it.
I suppose that you have been listening to all the discharge basis, but I hope you haven't built any hopes me being discharged soon. I figure it will be a year before they get to me. I've traveled a long way since I left Texas and you may not believe me but you have traveled right along with me all the time. (in my heart and mind), and that shortens the days for me. you really have seen some of this bug old world that way.
We left Camp Swift March 23rd, went to Camp Shanks, NY by way of Oklahoma, Kansas, Missouri, Illinois, Indiana,Michigan and Canada. We went by Niagara Falls but I didn't see much of it on account of a train obstructing the view.
We loaded out of N.Y. March 30th and sailed March 31st. We landed in Le Harve, France April 12th and rode that wonderful train I told you about to DuClair, a camp called Twenty Grand only 9 miles from Paris.
We left France for Belgium the next day after V-E Day and did we ever have a time. We were convoyed through in our trucks. The people there were really celebrating and when we left He Harve our trucks were filled with flowers.
We stayed in Belgium nine days and we really had a set-up there. We left Belgium after nine day stay for Marsaille , France going through luxembourg.
We landed in Marsaille on May 22nd and stayed till June 26th. I think I've tols about my stay there in a previous letter.
I told you about Jessie REid being transferred out of our company and his mail not being censored and that he would write and tell you about our leaving France.
We left France June 26th, saw the coast of Spain and North Africa and Porto Rico. Passed through the Panama Canal . It is a wonderful place and lots of Americans are there . We ate real hamburgers and spent American greenbacks.
We passed through the Marshall Islands on to the Caroline Islands.
We have been here three weeks, but I've just heard that censorship isn't lifted so I can't tell anything more just now.
Tell all the folds hello . That I'll write as soon as I get some more stationery and mail.
Good-bye and lots of love.
Your loving husband
Cpl. Raymond Whitsell

Peace and Freedom and Hope

Today America celebrated a birthday. Some celebrated with food, fireworks, family and or family. I celebrated mostly alone by my own choosing.I had a leisurely morning, a shopping trip to the mall, a crowded movie, time checking in with my Facebook friends then a trip to the local mall to set up my folding chair and watch the fireworks. Very boring day.
As I waited in line for the traffic to clear out I felt at peace. I was content. I shed a tear or two. Not because I am sad but because I knew I liked myself enough to enjoy my own company.
I got home, got ready for bed and could not wait to blog. I used to blog every day. I used to force myself to write. I don't force myself to drink buttermilk everyday. I couldn't wait to write tonight. People have come in my life for a reason. People have gone out of my life for a reason. I have regrets along the way but heard someone say yesterday " you can't live for the could of, would of, should of's in life. What you have done makes you who you are". I agree wholeheartedly.
I choose not to make myself a prisoner in my own life. I choose freedom from the past, the chains that bound me growing up, the agony I took as a teenager. I choose to be happy, to look at the sunny side of everything but that doesn't mean I am looking through rosy glasses. The life I am living is real.
I have good memories in life I choose to cherish. I have bad memories I choose to tuck away and desire them never to erupt again. I have had death threats made against me and my parents. I have been harmed. Those things I choose to tuck away.
The things I cherish...... Hmmmmmm, my very first kiss. Something I will never forget. How safe I felt when strong arms held me, some of the very sweet things some of my friends have told me, how proud I am of my boys. The first time I held each of my grand boys . Those are the type of memories that I could think about and drop my blood pressure a whole lot! Yes, those things give me peace and contentment. Those things are what I want to shape me into the person I want to be.
Well, that covers some of the peace and freedom. Now for hope. A very dear friend has given me two "hope " circles. These disc are a symbol of hope for the cure of cancer. She has a brother with a type of cancer so she shared. I don't know if she knew this or not but both of my parents died of cancer. These are very special to me. Brain cancer in '88 for my dad and colon cancer for my mom in '95. being an only child, my family was cute short early in my life. It is hard to believe I have been my only immediate family for 16 years. Yes, I hope there is a cure for cancer tomorrow. Yes, I hope cancer can be stopped or cured in millions of people. I hope cancer doesn't crop it's evil poison around anyone I know, love and care about, but it will .
That isn't the only hope I have. I hope I will continue to be as content with myself as I am today. I hope I continue to meet wonderful people along my life highway. I hope I can be a friend who makes a difference in someones life and I never know it. I hope I can be the best me I know how to be.
Right now those feelings of peace, freedom and hope give me contentment. I hope that might make me a better friend to some. At this time in my life, some do not perceive me as a good person. They are looking at one side, not the whole picture. I hope these people will. See a happy "me" soon and be happy for me also. If they cannot, I will never be able to sway them.
If you have been in my life for a season, whether it is a winter, spring summer or fall, I thank you. You are a part of what has made me who I am today.
Until I write again,
Peace!

The Road less Traveled

Some times we reach a spot in our lives that we don't know which fork in the road to take . Didn't one of the great writers tell us to take the road less traveled? I am not for sure that is the right path for me but I am taking the road I haven't ever traveled before. It makes me scared but at the same time I must find myself and search out my happiness. I have no idea where my happiness lies but I do know where it isn't. It isn't with me right now.
Some times people have dreams that make them doubt the decisions they make. Last night I had a dream I cannot even recant but when I woke up this morning I knew I was on the right path. I cannot rely on anyone to do it for me. I have to step out on faith that I can do this! It is scary but to grow I must move in this direction, I will stay the ever boring person I have become if I don't.
I have made a lot of mistakes in my life but those mistakes have helped me become who I am. Everyone learns from their mistakes. They just have to make the corrections and not keep repeating the the same boo boos. Maybe I won't find myself this time. Maybe it will take another turn in the road before I do. Maybe I hit pay dirt tomorrow.
I try to stay optimistic all the time but it is hard when you aren't optimistic in your heart. It isn't for everyone to start over but after a long battle with myself , now is the time. I looked in the mirror and found a peace this morning I haven't had in years.
Some of my boys don't understand this. I don't expect them to like it, just accept it.
I trust that people will judge me, but please don't til you walk that mile in my moccasins!
I may even chose a walk in the woods rather than either road right now.
Until later!

Pour some Water out of that Bucket!!!!!

Most of you have heard about my bucket list. If not, let's just say I have one and have led a very sheltered life. This weekend I marked another one of my bucket list or poured a little more water out of the bucket. Actually, most all that water went on my right foot where I hung it over a raft for 6 or so hours yesterday . Yes, rafting was on my list. I haven't been in a boat since I was 15. That was the only time I have ever been on a boat in my entire life until this raft. At 15 , one December night after a day spent at Disneyworld, I went out on a lake in Lutz, Florida with a 20 year old that wanted to scare me and boy did he! Full moon and he clipped a gator tail . Yes, I begged him to take me back to shore and he did!
Rafting Sunday was my next boat ride. Let me back up and tell you about my Saturday first! Saturday morning I went to a camping park called Quarry Park just below the dam at Norfork. There was a whole group of us and a little later in the day we went to a swimming area right by the dam. Saturday was my friend Cassy's birthday and she was camping with her friends and all their kiddos. We were all run out of the lake by Mr. Lightning and Mrs. Thunder. Back at the camper we got all the younger ones inside and Cassy and I picked up stuff around the campsite and tucked it away before the storms hit. Big wicked storm but short lived. It was enough however to drop the temp drastically and raise the fog on the water! Hence the beautiful picture!
After the storm passed over there was a small party for Cassy at the campsite. Somewhere between twenty and twenty five eating burgers, dogs , chicken, salads, fruit chips and all kinds of yummys. This was truly a great laid back party. Wish I could plan one so easily. Ashley did an awesome job of it!!!!
After a Saturday night crash, I was up bright and early. Randy and I went to a place called Skippers for breakfast while the world was still quite. Back to pack up, load up and hit the road to Missouri! I was so excited, so scared and did not have a clue what to expect. I can truthfully say the word " snakes" played around in my mind a lot also! Have I mentioned that I am not the greatest outdoors person??? If I haven't now is the time to tell you that snakes chiggers and ticks are not my friend by any stretch of the imagination and we did encounter a snake on Saturday!
Anyway, back to my story. There were 15 of us and three rafts . We made ourselves comfortable and started paddling. At first I am sure my hart was racing about 150 plus a minute! Anxiety was a little high to start but I did have a small distraction to start off the trip that took my mind off fear and by the time I realized it, I was okay in the water. The first mini rapid made my heart a little rapid also but the thrill of bouncing down the water was awesome. We would stop along the way, our raft did the panorama 360 quite a few times and it was always the coolest thing.
It is a shame I spent54 years of my life before i allowed myself to enjoy the water. I kept thinking I wish I had a water proof camera because I saw such beauty as we went down the river. I cannot remember smiling so much in a very long time.
Bucket list entries are a crap shoot. you will either love it or hate it or totally feel indifferent. I had the greatest emotion about it but most all of it was in my heart. I was with people I love, had the most peaceful of days and did not fall in the water. I am a survivor this time!!!!!
Take time to do for yourself. Well, in my case, I had help , but DO NOT wait for the right time. as Nike says....Just do it! If it is something you want to do, even if you don't enjoy it, you will be able to say you did what you wanted to do. I did! Thanks to all who made it special....Randy, Cassy, Brock(who kept me company on the drive up and back home. You rock!), Blair, Adam , Abby, Lindsey, Kee,Ashley, David, Lar-Lar-Gay, Mike and the boys. I had so much fun watching the boys and their silly antics in the water. Oh, and I cannot forget to thank Kee for being my rafting pal and my riding pal. We passed a lot of time together Sunday. You are the bestest, Kee!
When Kee and I sat on the bus to go back I couldn't help thinking "I don't think I could wipe this smile off my face if I tried!"
When Brock and I got in the car to come home and yes we made a wrong turn or two getting to West Plains, I had a contentment I haven't felt in a long time. Sigh!
In case you can' t tell this one gets a two thumbs up.

until next time......

Free Falling

Let me start off by saying I have no idea where this blog is going but I felt the urge to post. I know, sounds dumb!
For the last few years I have been on a roller coaster ride that hasn't been exactly pleasing. There have been downs, downs and more downs. Last summer, a friend made me open my mind, mouth and heart to take a good look at myself. I was to the point of feeling like I was about to explode every morning when I woke up and I hated to hear what anyone said to me. I could not face looking at myself in the mirror because I was so miserable. My friend told me that unless I addressed my issues with myself, I could never get any relief. I knew what two of my major problems were but had no idea how to face them.
I woke up feeling like I was in a prison, went to work feeling like I was in a prison and came home feeling like I was in a prison. By the end of last year I thought I was going to have to go to the funny farm. There had to be more to life than feeling like a prisoner in your own body. There was no haven for me anywhere. Thanks to my cousin I found a little solitude as I tried to sort things out.
It isn't that I want to be greedy, I just had not seen happiness in a very long time. If you cannot look in the mirror and like the person looking back at you there is a problem. I was there. Not only did I hate my world, I hated myself. That is a very bad spot to be. Through the years there have been people that have been exceptionally mean spirited to me and there have been people that have hurt me physically. until you release those things, there will not be a person looking back at you in the mirror that you will ever like.
When things change, sometimes not every one understands. There are loved ones that believe I am being selfish. There are loved ones believing that I am not being "open". There are loved ones who don't have a clue how bad I hated myself before I decided to do something about being me again.
I don't ask anyone to agree with me or take sides. I just ask that they understand how unhappy I am. Everyone deserves to be happy. If I am not happy, I sure cannot make the people around me happy. If I cannot be happy, I am guessing I am making everyone else as miserable as I am.
I am short, fat, ugly, uneducated, have no future but I have made up my mind to find happiness in life. If I am unhappy, it will be by my own doing. If I am unhappy, I shall have no one to blame but myself. There is a lot to learn about me. I am on the quest to find it.
For anyone that cares, no, I am not going off the deep end. ( I cannot swim and I am not ready to drown) I am going to wade in the water and get comfortable. I am going to pursue the things on my bucket list that I always felt I was too chicken to do. I am going to be a little more daring. I will look in the mirror and like the person looking back at me. I will be a free spirit.
In the last year I have learned to accept who I am. I am me. I should not be ashamed of who I am. I felt inferior to the people I graduated with. No more. I felt like I deserted the people I went to school for 9 years with. No more. I have connected with many old friends. Some from different areas of my life. I have learned to root for my friends. I have learned that it isn't about being jealous that others have life easier or have life worse. We are all alike. We all have feelings, we all hurt and we all put on our pants one leg at a time every morning.
If you ever hear me say that I am happy for you, that is not a platitude, it is honesty speaking. If I say I love you, I love you. If I say that my heart hurts for you, well, you get the picture.
If I can be honest with myself, I can be honest with you. I won't spill my guts about something I know about you that is a secret because I respect you. If I promise to pray for you, I will lift you up.
I am learning to be this person......one step at a time. I think that just might ultimately be the biggest thing I will ever do on my bucket list. Find myself.
Until I get the urge again,
Vera

OOOOPS! Where has the time gone!!

Oh, my. Where has the time gone. It has been seven months since I blogged. A world of events has passed my way in that length of time. I have stressed through work , family and friends yet here I am sitting at the same computer doing the same thing 7 months later. I wish I had the same mindset to address the same topics with the same mindset but "alas" that has gone out the window.
There have been many things that have changed who I am in the past half year. I have met new friends, left old friends behind and even rearranged my heart somewhat. We don't stay the same forever. How boring we would be if we did.
I had wonderful times in Jr. High school but if I kept that mentality where would I be. I had some fun times in high school but there again , I had not begun to go through the school of hard knocks.
I had things that looking back I sure wish I had done differently. The shy unspoken(ha) me should have done things different years ago. I did things selfishly that I believe were not right for me. God watched over and protected me anyway. Thank you God.
There was a quote the other day that says something to the effect that if you try and fail, you learned something. If you don't try at all, you are still standing in the same spot. I want to MOVE, MOVE, MOVE. That has never been my goal. I was ready to sit back and take what punches life had to give me.
there is a lot of "I" in this post but since I haven't written anything in a while , yes, this is about catching up on "ME". There have been blessings in the way of reconnecting with old friends, (thanks, Facebook), there are people that have passed on that influenced my life, there have been new people come into my life that have all made a difference and reshaping of my heart.
How about that long and winding road.....Where is it going to lead? Man, I don't know but you can't just sit on the side of the road.
Why can't we be friends....Man, I don't know but I have been blessed with many others.
Memories, pressed between the pages of my mind.... Man, now that I do know and in this time there have been good and bad ones. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
Dizzy, my head is spinning. Man, it goes around in a different circle cycle every day.
Me and you against the world! Man, yeah, but it seems there is a different you every day. (my quest for spreading friendship)
My favorite "Power" song right now..........

"I am woman!!! Hear me ROAR!

yep, that is my new theme song.
I am fifty three years old and aside from the fact there are some things I just won't write......let me just say that I can look in the mirror and like this "me" better than I have in many decades. I have found myself for the time being until someone else comes along and jolts me with insecurities.
God is my strength and my comforter and my family and friends can only hurt me as bad as I let them. (OK, sometimes "so-called friends)
If you choose to be my friend, welcome to my little world. If you think I am wacko or goofy, that is your choice. I don't need to pretend to be the person you think I need to be......I need to be .....ME!
I like me, I accept me and I want to be the best me I can be.
Maybe I should have titles this post "me" Naw!
Until I am inspired to share again........

Just Very Random Thoughts

My first thought of the day is.. some how my blog has been changed where I cannot choose the fonts I want nor print my words in color. If you know me at all, you know black and white are not my thing.....it is all about the color. You should see my house. I only have one large closet painted white. Everything else is bright. EERRGGHH blogspot!!!!!
My second thought... is when did my children become the parent and I become the child. Every project that I come up with, some child decides that they need to give me advise. I am a responsible adult. I haven't gotten this far in raising them without a few pitfalls but I did okay.
My third thought...I have teetered with the idea of riding bikes with a group all summer. I am a chicken because I haven't been on a bike since I was 17 but thought "it would do me good", "I can't do this. I am too old." , " it will lower my blood sugar", " I will wipe out first time and ruin a bike and me". You get the idea. I have wish-washed back and forth all summer. Well, I finally decided to take the plunge....Sooooooooooooooo, now comes the next fun part. I have to find a bike. Listening to two different people, I have gotten the idea. (maybe) I have to make sure the bike isn't too tall for me. I have to have it "fitted". It cannot have shocks,has to have a small tire(road bike) , a gel seat, (my tush is suppose to thank me) and an aluminum frame. And going back to my second thought, you guessed it. My first concern is that it is a pretty color. After I get outfitted, I will let you know how bad it adventure is on my body. Well, I could tell you know but I will save it for another post. Some of the group I will be riding with have only been riding a month or two , some are seasoned professionals. One of the girls that is a newbie rode 16.5 miles this week. Don't think I can make anywhere near that type of time or endurance, This gal is way too old. There again, I will let you know.
my fourth thought....Next weekend is Labor Day weekend and I simply cannot wait. Memorial Day weekend our class of '75 from Lake City got together for a reunion. It was awesome. We agreed that we needed to get together more often. Next weekend we are hosting a cookout for the gang. I personally wish there were more folks attending but I will take what we can get. I know this is a last long weekend of summer and a lot of people have plans, but for the ones of us that don't, it is burgers, dogs and Boston butt. Can't wait. These were the friends of my youth and we grow apart but that kindred spirit of youth still prevails. I am so excited.
Thought number five...I have been talking with one of my grandsons today and realize how much of their life we are missing. These are the days that they change every day and I know I am missing so much. If you aren't a Nana, you would not appreciate the fact that I listened to my 17 month old grandson talk for 30 minutes this afternoon. He says Nana and Pop Pop and I promise that he doesn't remember us from the last time we say him but I thank his parents that that talk about us even though we aren't there.
It has been a beautiful day in the neighborhood today and life is good. I started this blog early in the morning and have done a multitude of different activities during the day. I am sated with pleasing activities and ready to face tomorrow.
May your days be happy ones and your thoughts be randomly pleasing,
Vera

Summer is Over

Summer is over and time has shifted from fun in the sun to school and football.I am ready for the football. I can't wait to get out in the stadium and root for the home team. Now of course, it would be nice if the temps would drop about 25 degrees. I truly am looking forward to fall this year. First, there is the fact that my little cousin has walked on at stAte, then there is the fact that Doug is taking a couple of trips that leaves me time to get some things done around the house before Christmas decorating happens. Then there is the fact that I am going on a weekend sabbatical. I am looking so forward to that weekend. I can't wait to hibernate with a couple of good magazines , a good book, my ipod and tunes and pray that the weather cooperates. I love cool weather and hope that it has dropped to the point the if I go outside I need a lightweight jacket. Oh, yeah, that would be wonderful.
One of the first signs of fall is the grasshoppers on the windows at work. When they start to gather, I know that football is right around the corner.
I know that when football starts the first few games will be so hot that we will sit in the stands and sweat. By the time the season is over, we will all be wrapped in coats, mittens, hats, blankets and hot chocolate in our hands. Now THAT is football weather. Brock is a freshman walk on and he probably won't see much action this year but I will be there to support him whatever he does.
This year I had a new experience. All my kiddos have long since past the days of first day of school. I really don't miss those days, either. The young lady next door at work has an embroidery shop. "Commercial Threads" has been next door for a few months. Lisa, the owner, is a sweetheart I have know for 15 or so years and I was so excited when she moved in. I never dreamed that I would be helping her with her back to school rush. It was so much fun. I honestly cannot wait til the Christmas rush. We work late at night. She runs the machines and I clean everything up when it comes of the machine. I love taking the strings off, cleaning up the projects and seeing how neat they come out. I could be able to look at backpacks, lunch bags and preschool blankies and proudly say,"hey, I worked on that"!
Along with the end of summer, I have finished most of my Christmas cards and have started planning my holiday get togethers. Each year we tend to add a party or two. We love to welcome people into our house.
I have to come up with new foods to serve and new ways to decorate the trees . I love parties and when people come to my house, I want them to feel at home. I don't want fussy to dos. I want you to feel welcome in blue jeans or your best holiday togs. Getting ready for those parties is what fall means to me. When fall hits the air, Christmas is just around the corner.
Grasshoppers and Merry Christmas to one and all,
Vera

Be All that You Can Be

Wasn't that a motto from years gone by for one of the servicejpg (550×413)"> organizations. Army, National Guard or something? It isn't a bad motto. Who are we anyway. Why do we have to be less than our best when we are around other people. Why do we treat others less admirably than we want to be treated ourselves?

But if the shoe were on the other foot, we would be so appalled if we were treated awful. I heard so many stories of people being treated wrong for no reason. Who are we to judge and sentence people just for our own good. I really don't think God would look down on that kind of behavior with favor.

I have had people hurt me for their own gain. It hurts. I have heard friends tell me of similar stories. I hurt for them. I also have friends that retaliate. I don't know if that is the best effort but it works for them.

I heard a friend say that sometimes "karma bites". He was kind of joking but he was enjoying seeing the results for someone that deserved what they got. Now he really didn't wish it on the other person, but I think he got pleasure in that the person that had gotten their "just reward" shall we say.

So my thought really is...if we be all that we can be....everyone of us, what a better place this would be. There are times that I simply don't feel like being the best that I can be. There are times I have my own "pity party" and want to wallow in it. This morning I had a burst of temper or exasperation or something that I blew my stack. As soon as I took out my frustrations, I felt like an idiot that I blew it for no real reason. I immediately felt bad for taking it our on someone else. Someone that I care about. Why do we become the worst beast around those we care about. YES, I did apologize. That was after the fact. I never should have blown up like that.

Funny thing about this blog post. I started it yesterday and never got around to finishing it. Now I am eating crow. How sad. I had this thought in my own mind and still blew it. Man, do I feel like a heel.

I have learned a lot of things on the computer but one thing I haven't learned is how to download videos from you tube and post. There is a "Toy Story" song that goes something like "You got a friend in me". I really wish that I could download it to the blog . IT is so perfect for what is really on my mind. If I am the friend I should be, you will have a friend in me.

Really, what good does it do to lash out to someone else because we aren't happy or things aren't going our way. I used to hear someone say quite often, "don't judge another man this you walked a mile in his shoes, you never know what type of burden they are carrying." How true is that.I truly believe that if we make a conscious effort to put on a happy persona we can share happiness instead of bitterness.

We cannot change the whole world. Now that would be looking through rosy glasses. We can make an effort to change ourselves....one day at a time. Occasionally we will digress but forward momentum will sustain us to be better people.

until next time I am working on my temper,

sorry friend,

still working on it,

Vera

give life

As I ponder some of life's deepest questions I have come to realize that life really is short, we are just passing through this place for a short while on our way to a final destination, we will mess up, we will do some things right and we will have euphoria and well will have heartache. Those are just facts.

What we perceive as heartache....maybe it isn't so much heartache but we overachieve our own expectations. What we do right...maybe we think so lowly of ourselves that when life is done right we are elated. Are we over or underachievers in our own lives. Or do we sit around just waiting to see what yet another day may bring.

There are times when I feel as those I am in the middle of a season of bad luck. What else will happen. That is when I try to think good, happy thoughts and dreams to make it through. Then something else bad happens and in my mind I plotted a happy future. Now that puts me lower than ever.

I can only assume that we all have made dreams of the what ifs.....I won the lottery, I had a long lost rich cousin to die and I was the only heir, I found ten thousand dollars in a wallet and no one claimed it. You know the scene. In the end, it is all called financial security. It is all material.

I have two friends that have share a same dream. One is a young mother of one. The other an older father of four grown children. They have one major wish and or prayer that comes with a two edged sword. One needs a properly functioning kidney. The other a new heart. For each of these to achieve their desire in life, someone must die. How very sad. How sad that there are so many chances to pass on life to someone else yet our loved ones choose not to share with other families that are in need. I have for years signed my drivers license as a doner, this time I chose not to. Someone had talked me out of it. If I had something happen to me, I would hope that my family would at least see if I am a match for either of my friends first. I could give them something in death that I could never give them in life. If not for them, if I have healthy organs, please allow me to make someone else family happy by giving them the present of extended life to their own loved one.

I am convinced that when I do die, even with body parts removed, I shall obtain the perfect body again as soon as St. Peter stamps my hand and lets me through the pearly gates. What my body is like here on earth at that point doesn't matter. I prefer to be cremated but my family chooses not to do that to me. I do have other death request that I am adamant about but I do choose to share life with others in need. Friends first.

If I could know that should I be able to do that, I think that would be my greatest accomplishment while I walked this earth. If I could do that, I hope the people that reap the benefits would be appreciative of the gesture of someone that desired to see their life extended. God gave us his Son as the greatest gift. I think as a person, that could be our greatest gift.

I am hoping that if one person reads this and signs their card the next time you get your drivers' license it is worth writing this.

Give the gift of life,

Your love will be carried on,

Loving ya,

Vera

When things don't go the way we want.

As a mother, mother-in-law and Nana I want things to run smoothly for all my family. I don't like to see ripples in the water. And for sure, I hate seeing the water white cap.
When that water gets to stirring around my first instinct is to jump in and see if I can help. I am sure that isn't what my kiddos want to see me do but by now they know me. If there is a situation I think I can guide them about, well, I speak my mind. Sorry, that is my mother coming out in me.
Life is a little rocky for some of the younger Davis' right now and one of my little wise daughter-in-laws just really gave me a slap on the face last night. Ouch!
Life is changing drastically for them and I ask her what was in the plans for the near future. Her answer.."I don't know. We will just have to wait and see what God has in store for us". Now that is a double ouch.
You see, sometimes I really want to help God take care of things. I want to help micromanage what happens in our family. The need to feel in control is strong.
The choice to sit back and wait for God's direction is hard. The reminder from someone half my age to do so is even more painful. However, it does make my trust in their decisions so much better.
So today I am learning a lesson from the younger generation that I have preached but have not practiced.
Still trying,
Vera

I am looking for Advice

Today I am seeking advice from all who may read this blog that knows anything about a lab puppy. The Davis house is at our wits end with the most loving, stubborn 8 month old half Black Lab, half Newfy dog. She refuses to be potty trained, she gets things she knows she is not suppose to have....just to get us to chase her. It is her game. She does chew everything in site and most things we couldn't even begin to find. She jumps up on us every time we come through the door and she is so big we have trouble making her mind. Help!!!

We would take any advice anybody has to give us. Someone told Doug today..."Chew til two, then shed til dead." I don't know if our house can stand another sixteen months of puppy. EERRGGG! We try to keep her on a schedule but that doesn't always work. She gets up at least one if not twice in the middle of the night to go outside. Yep.... I get to take her out in the wee hours of the morning. She won't do her business unless we go out with her and give her a treat after she finishes.

I have tried things like pepper sauce on things she has chewed and she just licks the pepper sauce off. When you spat her with the fly swatter she thinks it is a game. Everything in the trash can is fair game for her to get and chew up.

I thought when we got her that she would be more Newfy than Lab but obviously, she has turned out to be mostly Lab.

Delilah goes on point so very easily that if she were trained and not so stubborn she would make a great hunt dog but since we don't hunt that is a moot point at our house.

Tried and true plans of attack would be great and you might try this type of idea would also be appreciated.

Mama is getting close to the snapping point around here and when mama snaps everyone knows.

I keep thinking that one day all the do's and don'ts will click in. Nope , hasn't happened. Like I said, she is a sweetheart when she is asleep but when she in on the prowl, no rest for the weary.

Until next time,

A dog trainer I ain't,

Vera

Love and Tears

For the past year, I think I have been on automatic overdrive. I don't think there is such a term but I hope you get the picture. There are things I am responsible for, I do them and move on to the next chore. Whether it be at home, church, work or play. I take one project at a time, finish it and move on to the next. Never planning to far ahead.
My emotions have been in the same gear. I cannot remember the last bout of tears. My thought process has only assimilated the immediate project at hand. I knew I had not turned callous but I have become matter of fact. Yes, my heart still hurts at things but I simply choose not to let emotions get involved. You know that when a young mother comes into your place of work and has to order a casket spray for her stillborn babe there is no way you don't want to walk around the counter and give them a hug.
My week just seemed to come tumbling down this week. My boss had yet another surgery this week. I worry for his health, and when he is gone, my day consist of being inside the four walls of the shop from 7 or earlier to 4:45. I miss the getting out and seeing people as I deliver flowers to them. I sat on pins and needles waiting on updates of my boss. I found out this week a long time acquaintance has some very serious health issues. I have ladies in my Sunday School class that are dealing with family issues. Three of them have encountered deaths in their family in the last few months. Three of them are dealing with aging parents on a daily basis. Then I have the friend who had a nephew killed and I know her hurt along with her daughters' hurt as well as knowing the young man that was killed. Then I had a friend tell me last night he was having a health flare up. The weather has been bad and Doug has been dealing with his asthma the last few days.
To add the fact that there was a job change in our house a couple of months ago and I constantly worry about my grown children and everything that happens in their lives. One daughter-in-law has been having health issues that have not been diagnosed. Another has a tear in her knee requiring surgery probably pretty soon.
In saying all that, let me explain that when I care, I worry, I take everything to heart. I guess I am the martyr of worrying. Last night after I found out about the death of the young man, that was my melting spot. All the tears that I had pent up for so long finally broke loose. The tears have been in abundance. Maybe it is good. Maybe it is bad. At present it is simply a fact. I cry as I write this.
As I prepared to teach the Sunday School lesson this morning the lesson was from Philippians 4 . The wrap up of Paul telling us to be joyous in every situation. Funny (ironic) that this was the one morning that I couldn't plaster a smile on my face and take Paul's word to heart. There were simply too many people hurting in that room.
Funny, the song I am listening to right now is "The Way we Were". Memories. Good ones, bad ones. They all shape our lives. Don't worry about me. I will be okay and put my shield back up. May take a day or two but I will put back on my strong persona and keep on trucking. I may not be as good a friend as I need to be to all while I am having my pity party but I will rebound.
I love my family...I love my friends...and there isn't anything I wouldn't do for those I care about if it is within my realm of capabilities. If I count you as friend, know that you are loved and there is a spot for you in my heart. My heart will grow with every friend I meet. There is room for you all. I hope you feel the same way.
If you are my friend or my family I hope you can come to me with what is on your heart and talk and know that I will listen and not judge. My ears are always open for friends and family. I might have to squeeze a time slot in for you but I want to be there for all that I love.
So until I write a touch of prose again...
Love makes the world go round !!
Vera

If I had more time would I still be Messy????

For someone that works 5 and one half days a week today is a very special day. As a matter of fact this whole weekend has been. I usually teach Sunday School every Sunday and there was no Sunday School yesterday. That gave me a free Sunday. With yesterday being the holiday and me being off today, well today is sheer bliss. I got up when I wanted to....two days in a row. I ate breakfast when I wanted to, stayed up as late as I liked on Saturday and Sunday night. Ahhhhh, sheer bliss.
If I ever have another job, 5 days will be a max for me. I might even strive for a 3 or 4 day work week. Wouldn't that be wonderful for somebody who has been regimented 7 days a week for 33 years. What would I do? Well, let's see. My energy level is at it's highest first thing in the morning. I could do cleaning while no one is home. That is a start. I could shop when the stores are not covered up with angry tired people that just got off work themselves. That would be wonderful. I could Christmas shop without every register being lined up 10 people deep. Oh, the possibilities are endless.
I could win the powerball and I could retire FOREVER. The only problem with that is that I would have to buy a powerball ticket. Can't win without buying a ticket, right?
Next, I could do a little more traveling. Grand kids would be calling my name. Oh, yeah. There is one thing that I would make sure to day that I have never been capable of doing. I would fine somewhere to volunteer. I don't care what it is. It could be an animal shelter, one of the local hospitals or some crisis center. There has to be some place that would need me and I could be the right fit.
But what would be my one project if I had spare time? I would rid my house of junk, junque, and more junk!!!!!!
Every room has drawers and closets that need to have tons of stuff discarded. If I took one room at a time, it could take weeks but I would finally get rid of lots of stuff we have accumulated over the years. Getting rid of stuff might allow me to be a tad more organized, too. You know the old saying a place for everything and everything in its place, or something like that. How I would love to be able to go some place and what ever I was hunting for be right there.
I have so much stuff that has to be organized that I don't even know where to start. Yesterday, I threw away a whole garbage sack of papers and old stuff just out of one room. I am the only person that uses the room and I haven't even dug the pictures out from under the bed and worked on that. I need to scrapbook a ton of pictures so I can put the others away. With so much to do, I just fail to be motivated. One of these day, I will have the energy and desire to do it. But until that day, I have about 4 boxes of pictures and 3 or 4 photo albums that need to be filled. One of these days..... One of these days.
I have a dream. Don't tell any body but some day the flower shop will close or sell and my dream is to not work for the public but to have a wedding consultation business. Work out of my own home. Be a wedding coordinator slash director. I know that would put me to work every week end but hey, I would have other days free. I know quite a bit about the business and I enjoy making brides' special day a easy as possible. That is one of my greatest satisfactions. BUT...if that is to happen....I need an organized office. Where I want my office looks like a bomb has gone off. So much to do, I don't know where to start. Yes, I do. Another "one garbage bag at a time" project.
Aside from that, if you know of a bride that needs a wedding coordinator, I will work cheap until I try to do this full time. Feel free to be a name dropper for me!!!!
Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, makes me happier than to know the bride thinks she has pulled off the perfect wedding day. In case you didn't know it, there is no such time as a perfect wedding day. I have never encountered a wedding that there wasn't at least one planned thing that flopped. I always tell the bride not to get uptight because something will happen.
I heard a story from a friend that they were at a wedding and when the bride and groom knelled to pray, the groomsmen had put "call" on one of the grooms shoes and "911" on the other shoe. That cracked up prayer time. It is gonna happen.
But that is a story line for another day. Everything that could go wrong at a wedding will. I will have to remember that for a blog. Well, my random thoughts are rambling today, so until the next time...
Dreaming of organization,
Vera

July 4th Holidays

Tomorrow marks the first of July. With that in mind, we embark upon our true National Holiday. We as Americans celebrate some other national holidays, but this is our True one. The one where our freedom is remembered and celebrated annually. Most of us don't take the time to appreciate what this day really means.
Oh, sure it is a day (or few days) off from the rat race, met with family and friends grilling and eating ice cream and watermelon. The day is culminated with fireworks and mosquitoes and everyone goes home hot, tired and feeling good for another year.
We may even listen to a tad of patriotic music as we watch the fireworks with the added appropriate ohhs and ahhhs.
We have freedom....freedom to choose to worship our God. Our country tends to forget that is what we came over here for. To get away from the dictatorship of telling us what we can and cannot do. Now we cannot have a nativity or the mention of God on our courthouse lawns. The atheist have made sure of that. Their claim is that by adding God to our country their rights are not met. Hello!!!! Anybody listening???? We moved here to have the choice to worship our God in our own way. That would be by having prayer in our schools, God on our courthouse lawns at Christmas , "under God" in our pledge and the gospel allowed to be spoken over the airwaves . Now in saying that, If you do not Believe, you have the right to omit "Under God" and you have the right not to admire the Nativity, but you have the obligation not to celebrate the Christmas Season, also. Cannot have your cake and eat it, too. (So to speak.)
Now to get off my soapbox and recant some wonderful July 4th memories....As a child, our 4th was spent at Walnut Ridge and Portia every year having a fish fry or a feast. No hamburgers and chips for this family. Many years it was catfish and all the trimmings. As I got older, it was roast, fried chicken, fresh garden veggies and desserts galore. We had to make this trip every year so that my dad could make his annual trek to the Portia picnic. He would sometimes take me along but this was a trip for him. Every person he had every met in Lawrence County would be there and he would have to talk to them. I would politely stand by his side, observing all the rides that I knew I would not be allowed to ride. All the other kids got to ride and have fun....I got to stand by my dad and listen to conversations about the weather and how it would affect crops.
I don't think I ever shot off a firecracker until I had a drivers license.
After my kiddos came along, it was a treat to go to the Elks lodge and watch the fireworks at night. Yes, we had burgers, dogs chips and watermelon. Things I missed as a kid. In 1983 we sat on the Jernigan's lawn and had a perfect view of the fireworks. The only difference is that it probably was still 95 degrees that night and I was 3 days from delivering Blake. I was miserable and Jeremiah kept crying that the noise hurt his ears. I thought..."Am I crazy? I don't like it, Jeremiah doesn't like it, Doug is mad at Jeremiah because he is upset and Douglas is upset because he thought we were going to leave early. What in the world am I doing?" Looking back it was a wonderful memory. I was not at the time. How time changes things we remember!!
Later in life, Doug and I went to Atlanta to visit friends one summer. While we were there, the four of us went to Stone Mountain for the laser show. This was before lasers were everywhere. The finale was Lee Greenwood singing his famous song "I am proud to be an American". The evening was awesome and I thought that one day I would take my kids back on the Fourth of July to see that. Yeah, right!! Me and ten million other people. That never did happen but I did think that would be the perfect 'Ward and June Cleaver' adventure.
Life changes, we grow older, kids grow up and there is a new generation now cooking burgers and dogs for their families, having wagon parades in the neighborhoods, and waving their flags of freedom to the music of outdoor concerts playing all our patriotic music.
War happens, peace happens, soldiers fight for our freedom today just like they did 225 years ago. Some come home, some don't, the price is high for you and me to live in the land of the free. Do NOT take the privilege lightly. Never fail to appreciate the people that fight for our freedom. On foreign soil and on our home soil. In the military and our law enforcement on city , county , state and federal levels. They protect us every day. We can never say that we are 100 percent safe but we can say that we have the best protection of any country on this earth.
I am proud to be an American,
today and always,
Vera

Mama is Worried

"RACINE - Is President Barack Obama visiting Racine?

The White House has announced that Obama will be in southeastern Wisconsin Wednesday.

They have not yet announced the location of his visit, but NBC Chicago announced Friday that he is coming to Racine.

Racine officials also said they have heard rumors about the visit, but could not confirm it.

NBC's site said, 'President Barack Obama plans to travel to Racine, Wisconsin next week to discuss the economy....The White House just released a note for planning purposes.'

Matt Lehrich, the White House's Midwest communication director, could not confirm their report. He said the location of the president's visit would be formally announced in the next couple days.

Obama came to Racine in February 2008 as a part of his presidential campaign and spoke at Memorial Hall, 72 7th St."

Douglas, our oldest son, called me yesterday and had me to look up this article in the Racine Journal Times. He had been hinting to keep checking the paper for the last few days. I have to admit, he didn't say a word about it, BUT, he had told me that he had a lot of extra pressure at work last week. I would never have dreamed that this was what his extra pressure was.

Douglas has dealt with President Obama when he was presidential candidate Obama in when Douglas worked at a facility in Davenport, Iowa. Secret Service it tight for candidates but even tighter for a sitting president.

If any of you know my son, well, you know he walks to the beat of the different drummer, as they say. If he thinks it...he says it. If he says he is gonna do it....well, he does. Now don't get me wrong, I don't think Douglas is ANTI Obama. He has learned in his profession not to judge politics. He has to deal with all kinds. What he tends to do is get upset very easily with....how shall I put this mildly...."stupid people". Whether it is his own staff or the contact people for events. He is learning to keep his mouth shut, but , bless his heart, it just opens sometimes.

HENCE, this mama's worry for the next few days. I can just see him getting mad about something and spouting off right in the middle of the presidents discussion period and the secret service having Douglas on the floor and in handcuffs in a heartbeat. Don't tell me that I exaggerate. This could actually happen. If you happen to see me Wednesday, please don't tell me that CNN or Fox has reported that the Operations Director at the Racine Civic Center has been arrested during the president's visit.

This mama will be so glad when Thursday gets here.

I love you Douglas,

Mama

CHOICES

I had thought about a topic for my next muse and just as I sat down I read m daughter-in-laws last post to her blog. She just confirmed that I needed to write about choices.

I am a 50 something wife, mother, work 5 1/2 day a week, church on Sunday gal. All 7 days of my week are filled.....every week. That puts me in a routine. There is safety in routines. News flash, though....that routine can turn into boredom. I am such a boring person, even I don't like me sometimes... Why should anybody else.

Last month, I did something out of the ordinary. I went to the class reunion from the school I should have graduated from. (Long story for another day). I have not kept up with these people very much because I felt that I didn't fit in since I left. I wrote a post on that so I shan't dwell on that aspect.

Since then, I have picked up a friendship with a few of these folks that I would never had thought of doing. It is like I was 15 again and we never skipped a day.

Had I stayed in the rut and chose not to go to the reunion dinner, I would have missed such a wonderful opportunity. I would have missed the chance of a lifetime to rekindle old friendships.

When I go shopping, Doug will tag along and go from bench to bench and I always feel hurried. Last night I told he to sit at Barnes and Noble (I knew he was tired) and I would just shop the mall. I wasn't hurried and had FUN just browsing for a change. I forgot what that was like. I usually am always on a quest when I go shopping and it was so much fun just to look!

I always spend tons of time on the computer but unless it is my kiddos I have never grabbed the chance to chat with friends on facebook. I have learned that I would much rather chat with friends than surf the facebook notes. I am reconnecting with people that I have forgotten to maintain friendships with and I really do care about their lives. I just have never shown it. I am such a bad friend. I hope all these people don't think I have been a snob, I just was in a rut and chose not to get involved. Sorry friends!

One of my secret wants in life has always been to get a tattoo. Funny, I have 3 sons and none of them want a tattoo. I have one daughter-in-law that wants a tat -too. (groan) Maybe we will go together sometime and get one. Anyone have a suggestion on what I might get or where I should put it? Let me know. What do you think about the hearts. I don't want to show off a tattoo , just have one.

Another dream I have had for years, doesn't make sense but I have been thinking about it again. I want to go away for a weekend. Just me and maybe two or three good magazines and a very good book. I want to get up when I want to, read what I want to, walk when I want to, sleep when I want to and just take time to pamper me. Take me a two litre of Diet Dr. Pepper, maybe some grapes and cheese, some coffee, creamer and splenda. Don't know that I will ever get the guts up to do that one, but it is still in the back of my mind. Doug has been to De Gray and said it was pretty. That might be a great fall weekend. Yes, I do believe I could sit on that porch for 48 hours all by myself. Sigh!!

The one thing that I CHOOSE is to make a conscious effort to be happy every day. No one else wants to hear my woes and the more I share them the lower I get. I choose to be happy, instead. This past year has been stressful and from time to time I want to escape that everyday life. Another reason the get a way sound awesome. It sounds better every day...

Still pondering,

Vera

Getting ready for Christmas 2010

Well, friends, I have spent the last few days trying to set up my Christmas 2010 blog. Not with much success, I am sad to report. In the past I have set up 3 blogs. I worked out all the details of blogs 1, 2, and 3 by myself in a snap. This one has me buffaloed. I want to do something a little different and I have butt my head against the wall for days. In case you don't know it about me...I hate being frustrated!!

I have learned how to erase and edit codes. Now that one scared the bejeezzzzzzus out of me. If I had anything written yet, I am not sure I would have tried it. When I ask my son, the techie nerd, for help, he tells me that isn't something he has ever done before. Well, hello, if you can build, strip, reformat, and write programs for one of these darned ole contraptions , surely you can sure a few minutes and get some answers for me.

I as excited about the Christmas blog for this year. I plan to make it a work in progress instead of just posting the trees like I did last year. When I get a few blogs added, I will share with everyone. I just got in the habit of sharing this one every time I posted so I still do.

The Christmas Tree Lady is already falling behind for the year. I don't have all my trees planned out nor where to put them. I have my Christmas cards bought and still plan to address them next week. That is a traditional "Fourth of July" event at my house. I usually have parties set and menus already planned out.

You can laugh all you want to, but come mid September, all hands and minds will be to start implementing the plan for the season. That is the PLAN that isn't complete yet.

With my love for the Christmas holiday season, I still remember that all the fun is paled by the real reason we celebrate. How wonderful it is to have a Saviour that died for all our sins. A God that forgives our mistakes and loves us unconditionally. Nothing compares to those thoughts at the holiday time, but I never want to miss an opportunity to open my home and welcome guest to share the season with us.

Now bear in mind, this is not a "House Beautiful" home. It is more like a "Country Cottage" home but I hope that all people that grace our doors will feel welcomed and comfortable while we partake of the joys of the season.

I am getting excited about making more plans even as I report on my lack of effort to date. Can't wait to get some plans laid out.

The one thing I do know it that our family tree( our main themed tree of the season) will be "teddy bears" and I we have already picked out the pattern for Doug's ornaments. Every year the number of ornaments he makes increases. This year, I am guessing he will make close to one hundred ornaments to give to our friends and family. Yes, that is a lot of hard work. It is also a labor of love. And a wonderful testimony to all the friends that we have.

I am blessed to have so many and such wonderful friends!

Getting ready to start planning the Season.

The Christmas Tree Lady,

Vera

to Dads old and New...

Today if Father's Day. Happy Father's day to all dad's who read this. It takes more that just having the baby to be a father.

It takes:

unconditional love

many early nights of changing diapers

many school nights of homework assignments

many teen years of waiting up late for them to come home

one hard day of letting them go

many years of watching their lives from afar

an eternity of always caring about their lives

and did I mention unconditional love?

I have had the pleasure to encounter many great dads. The dad that come home late and checked homework even though he wasn't there in the evenings.

The dad that was a cub scout leader.

The dad that made soccer games even though they did not totally understand the game.

The dad that is totally inept but would stay up all night putting together a Christmas toy.

The dad that wore his lucky shirt to all his sons' ballgames.

The dad that works 60 hours a week and still coaches kiddy ballgames.

There are many ways to show love to a child without giving them the world on a platter and all the ways that I mentioned are prime examples of Love. I am sure in each situation, dad would have preferred to take a snooze on the sofa or watch a little baseball but chose to do the thing that would make a memory with a child.

After children are grown, we have to let them try their wings. Children will never understand just how hard this is until they hit that milestone themselves. Kids cannot understand why we worry. "I am mature, I can take care of myself!" Maybe you can but sometimes you may be in that situation were you need a little help. That is what parental concern is all about.

What is the just reward for being a great dad? Satisfaction in knowing that maybe you helped shape the son or daughter into the person they are today. If you ask my husband, he will tell you "grandchildren". Yes, we joke about that. You put up with these kids all these years, just to be able to have grandkids.

So if you are one of those people that get exasperated over a dad that worries over you, just remember that worry comes with a ton of love. The desire for you to have a good life. And what is the thanks we get for that? I think back to the days of my youth to a song by Cat Stephens (before he changed his name) about "The Cat's in the Cradle", dad is busy while son is growing up. dad grows older and slows down but son is too busy to enjoy life with dad.

Is that not what we call the circle of life? One thing I have learned in my half century plus of living. Most of us spend too much time planning the future that we forget to enjoy the present.

What ever you choose to do today for Fathers Day, the one thing I urge everyone to day is live for today. Don't dwell on the past or make plans to change a loved one for the future. Enjoy today!!

Happy Fathers Day 2010,

Vera

The dog days of ....SPRING?????

August is typically known as the dog days of summer. We have hit dog days. It is so hot even the dogs won't do anything. It is all in an effort to stay cool. The computer shows it is 96 outside. The thermostat shows it is 79 in here. It really isn't that hot because we have fans going everywhere. The thing about it is...it is still spring according to the calender. We have heat advisories out and everybody you meet say"think it is hot enough for you?".

Yes, it is hot enough. It is way too hot. It won't be long til some weather reporter will say "let's see if the egg will fry on the sidewalk". Who cares !! We are not going to eat the egg anyway.

What we will do is fuss about how hot it is. Read in the paper about someone dying from heat stroke while out running in 105 degree weather. Hear of an elderly person dying in a hot house because they are scared to open the windows and didn't have an air conditioner. People in ER's and 911 centers will be overly aware of how heavy the oppressive heat is affecting our community. We fuss about how hot the heat is and go on about our business.

I don't really understand why it gets so hot. I don't know why it gets so cold. I don't know why we have ice storms or tornadoes. But...we do. God chooses to place these extreme weather patterns in our lives. Maybe it is because we need to fuss.( Yeah, right.) Maybe it is because God wants to remind us who is in control.

People MUST use common sense when it comes to extreme weather. Take care of you selves and the pets . Stay as cool as possible and , well.....make the best of those lazy, hazy days of SPRING.

Until later,

chill dude,

Vera